Walking out after my presentation last week, I was asked the following by one of their team members:
How do you influence someone who is fixed in their beliefs?
The answer I wish I’d given came to me later:
Don’t try to change beliefs. Change actions.
Beliefs can be deeply ingrained and central to identity. They’re how people make sense of the world. While you can change them, it’s not easy.
Many actions, on the other hand, don’t rely on identity at all. I stand on the left of an escalator because it’s the norm in Australia. I sit in the same seat at the dinner table out of habit.
Truth is, beliefs and actions can be different.
I say “bless you” when someone sneezes, even though I don’t believe it will protect them. We tolerate bad meetings, even if we believe time is precious.
This is good news, because while someone with firm views can feel like a brick wall, you don’t need to change their beliefs.
You just need to get them to act.
How?
Address the three barriers to action using the Williams Behaviour Change Model.
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Apathy - they’re not interested
Start from a place of commonality. Replay their words back to them, like “John, I’ve been thinking about what you said about…” Then, “there’s a way we can get there faster than we originally thought.”
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Overwhelm - they’re confused by what you’re asking
Cut to the chase with a strong recommendation. Don’t get them to commit to the whole project. Get them to agree to the next step.
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Fear - they’re worried about fallout
Minimise risk to them, not just your organisation. Show how this strengthens their position relative to others (peers, competitors), and how they will maintain control.
Their beliefs may be fixed. Their next step isn’t.
P.S. Stumbling in the moment and reflecting on how to answer it better is classic introvert behaviour.
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